thoughts of love... from a closet...

So time for a short post... hopefully...

Living in a hundred year old house that my land lady, Kelli, inherited from her grandmother, one is bound to find interesting treasures at every turn. But this one, I was very surprised at. I mean we have a punch bowl from Tiffany's and an old record player that still works. Old coats that look like they came right of of "The Chronicles of Narnia" and ancient chairs that have a potential of breaking on contact. But this was very exciting.
Today I wanted to spend some time alone reading my Bible and praying... so I went to the one place in the house that I know I can always be left alone. Which, I tell you, is very hard to find a place like that. That place is Kelli's closet. It's not like a normal closet. It's pretty big. A walk in with about enough room to fit two to three dressers and still have room in the middle to spread out. So there I was...
And what was I thinking of? I was thinking about how hard it is to understand God's great love. I mean if you really think about it, it's pretty crazy.
Suddenly, I got distracted... there are just as many treasures in that closet as there are in the rest of the house, but i looked to my side and found letters. And not just any letters. I found letter to Kelli's late grandmother from her husband while he was away at war. As much as I thought it would be invading privacy to read them, I figured at this point, they wouldn't mind much. I open the first one, read it, and seriously almost started crying as I read it. The passion with which He wrote this leader was remarkable. I mean you hear about love letters from war on tv and in movies, but to see a real one in my hand to some one whose house I am living in, was surreal. it was a genuine love letter from war. There were things like "I long for you." "How I miss you." "I wish I was with you to see you and the baby." then as it went on "When I get back I will buy you all the pretty things you want." "I will love you eternally and completely."
And tears were falling down my cheeks. Partly because I was super emotional today, but mostly because you could just feel what he was feeling... incredible. And then I realized... God was talking to me through this letter. I realized that if a frail human can have that kind of emotion and passion for another, how much more an infinite God with infinite love that sees me as His own, righteous creation... wow! And He sent me a love letter too... His Word. With all sorts of love notes to discover. Consider this one... "For God so loved the World that He gave His only begotten Son that whoever believes in Him shall not perish but have everlasting life." I know we hear this all the time, but think about what it is really saying to you. "I love you. I long for you. So much so that I gave the ultimate sacrifice of sending my own Son to die for you. So that through Him and what he did for you, you will be saved from death. I've given you the ultimate gift. And now I can have you with me forever."
Frankly, I'm speechless at this point. what more is there to say? I guess Selah would be appropriate here. What an awesome God we serve.

ballet flats in the snow and hungry children

So it's break... I haven't done any dancing (or any conditioning for that matter) for about three days now, and even though I'm enjoying the break, I dreading the return cause I'm already out of shape and I still have 4 more days yet. But I guess I can't complain because I think my body needed it. However break also means I don't have any cool stories to tell, so please bare with me as I spout of random thoughts.

You know those time when you do something you know is stupid, but either in your naiveness or just in the fact that you are running short on time you do it anyway? I had one of those moments the other day. Maybe not on a large scale form, but looking back it was still pretty stupid. For those of you that have never lived in cold environments, you may not understand this story completely.... but for those of you who do, I hope you don't laugh too hard. The other day, I decided that it would be a great idea to not wear my boots. Normally, I wear my boots and change my shoes once I get to work. This time, however I thought "Hey, it isn't snowing today! I'll just wear my ballet flats so I don't have to change shoes!" Of course, I forgot about the two feet of snow sitting right around my car. In order to even reach my car, I have to walk over an icy path and through the snow covered drive way. And even though it wasn't snowing, it was cold, which means the wet snow on the ground was turning icy. i managed to get almost the whole way there, and then sure enough... ker-splat! my foot slips on an icy spot and the whole thing goes right in to the snow... by this point there was no going back. I got in my car and my foot was freezing the whole way to work. But I guess my point isn't that I did something stupid or even that my foot was REALLY cold.
Why is it that it is so easy for us to blame anything else but ourselves? I mean really I had two options when my foot slipped and ended being some what like and icicle. One, I could be honest with myself and say "Yes, I made that mistake of not wearing my boots like i should have," or I could go off and blame the snow... "Stupid snow!" How many time have we all done that... I mean seriously. You bang into the corner of the wall and say the wall jumped out at you... you hit too many buttons on the computer at once and it freezes up on you and you say stupid computer...
Obviously, these are all pretty innocent examples, in fact ones we can even laugh at... I certainly know a few people that have said those things before. But it's what is sad is when it doesn't become quite so innocent. When it ends up hurting some one else and not an object without feelings. And we all do it... since day one... when Adam and Eve fell. Adam says " hey God its all because of that darn woman you gave me." Eve says, "don't look at me, it was the serpent." From day one! So I've been thinking... why do we do that? Why are we so much more apt to put the blame on some one else that take responsibility for ourselves. I think, for me at least, it easily stems from a combination of unhealthy sense of pride and selfishness. If anything, I don't want this pride that I've built up so much to be hurt so I will do anything to keep it intact as much as possible. But even more than that, in my selfishness I think I would rather not take the responsibility for what I know the consequences of that action are. Whether it be the fact that I have to give something of myself for some cause, or that I don't want to take on the punishment for something stupid I know I shouldn't have done in the first place.
And let me take it one step further. How many times do we blame God??? I don't know how many times I've heard, "If there really is a God why are there starving children?" etc. Here is what my pastor said today that got me thinking. "It's easier to blame God for the starving children then to take the responsibility to do something about it." I don't know if I could put it an a better way.
So what is the answer then? The same that I see for all of our short comings: In the arms of Christ! When we fall, He gives us grace. When our pride goes out of control, He humbles us. Honestly, for me I find that when I see myself as He does I don't care what mistakes I have made because I know they are covered in His blood. My heart wants what He wants when I am in His presences, and suddenly the responsibilities of the world, whether they have come by some mistake, or they seems too big to handle, don't seems quite so bad because I know He is upholding me in His hands.
Also, I think it is important to remember that God commands us to love one another. Something that I am learning is easier said than done. 1 John says that love is from God, and whoever loves God has been born of God and knows God. And also we love because He first loved us. In the same way we find freedom from the selfish desires that hold us down in the arms of Christ, we receive the ability to love others as we are receiving His love. We can't give out the love we don't have. Let us seek His face, and as we behold Him, be transformed in to His likeness...
... thanks for listening to me ramble...
-Alyssa

Another week, another post, but, oh, the joy of sharing what God is doing here!

So here we are again... I just finished eating my dinner after getting home from work. :) in other words, not much to report about today. I can, however give you an update on what I've been doing with Light of the World Ballet! woohoo! Let's see if Alyssa can keep her thoughts straight this late at night.

On the 9th we performed at Westside Manor adult home. It was a blast... and my roomie's first attempt at doing a booking by herself. Give it up for Breanne! hehe. I thought the performance went pretty well considering the small space and low ceiling, but I think the more we do small spaces the better we get at it... I think the Philippines helped with that one a lot too. Those were some small spaces! We did, however, have a last minute change of dances we would perform, and the quick decision that large and hard pointe shoes may not be the best idea in a space where we would be dancing so close together. Ouch! Thankfully we figured that out before the show!
I got to talk to some of the residents. They were all so sweet. I love sharing with people that are so open to what I have to say. I met one lady whose parent-in-laws were missionaries to China! That one kind of blew me away.

On Monday we got together with some of the interns at Believer's Chapel for the application of the treasure hunting they taught us two weeks before. It was a very unique and exciting experience. I went with one of my house mates, Rachel and one of the interns name Chris. I think we made a good team. We got to pray with a couple people for healing and family stuff. We also had some people run away, but what can you expect. It was so exciting, though, to see how God can put you in the right place, at the right time, to talk to even just one person that really needs a touch from God. I can't wait to do it again!

Then yesterday we had two performances, the first was at a refugee center. For those of you who don't know, Syracuse is bringing in refugees here to start a new life. Its cool to be able to get to know so many cultures in one place, but it is also hard because the people come with no money and no idea how to adjust to the culture. That is why there are places like the Catholic Charities place we performed at. To help them got on their feet and teach them everyday things that you and I often take for granted. The performance went well, even though they couldn't understand us very well, but we also got to teach the kids dance steps, which was really fun. We have very much come to find that the language of dance can really tear down language barriers.
After that we had some time to eat and do much needed back messages on each other before we headed of to the BASIC meeting at Onondaga Community College. BASIC stands for Brothers and Sisters In Christ. It is the Christian group on campus. The leaders go to Alyssa I and Amy's church, so we had the connection and were able to encourage the whole group! it was great. Another small space, but still very exciting. I'm still pretty amazed at how many people I am getting to meet and minister to. It is almost overwhelming to think about! And yet, it seems so natural. I guess it's because this is where God has put me for this season. Plus, it's our commandment isn't it? To go and MAKE DISCIPLES. wow. it's really exciting.

Tomorrow we have one more class before break... I really don't know what I am going to do with myself with no dancing for a whole week! Thankfully I still have work, otherwise I think I would go crazy!

St. Augustine's

February 9th 2010, we performed at a church called St. Augustine's. The performance was not for the church, but rather for their after school Bible club they hold there at one of the buildiings. The kids come in right after school to share some time together and their faith. What a blessing it was to encourage them! All the kids had smiling faces and were so excited to see us. I even had one little girl constantly waving to me. It was so cute.

Our day started out pretty typical with devotions, class, and rehersal. Then we loaded the van and headed across town. We actually made it about 15 minutes early, so we waited in the car... for some time... until we finally got the idea that the doors ight already be unlocked. So I walked up and, lo! They were already open. So it was out with the flooring, costumes and props and on to setting up for the show. We moved some big carpets around so that we would have more room to dance, but to me it seemed like those carpets haven't been moved for quite some time, as I was smelling mildew after moving one of them. But, we got the space we needed and everything was set. The show started at about 2:30.

I thank God looking back on the performance now, because we had just changed a lot of the coreography the week before. One of the trainees was let go last week, and we've been working on changing everything to accomodate the lack of one person. So, considering the recent changes, I thought the performance aspect of the show went very well! I even had a whole new part I learned, and well, I was pretty darn proud of myself... just saying. ha!

We got to perform Mother India ballet and Won't Turn Back. The kids love both, and were clapping and really getting into the Won't Turn Back dance. Amy shared her testimony, and also helped us out by teaching the kid s steps at the end. Accompanied by Rachel and yours truly, we got to teach them the positions of ballet and a few of them got to learn harder steps like turns and jumps. In the mean time, due to our lack of time, the other girls were striking the floor so that tear down would go quicker. Typically, we wait till afte we are done teaching the kids, but this time we did it during! Let's just say it was an interseting experience with a bunch of energetic kids and all... :)

We finished striking and tear down in 10 minutes! I would say that is a new record! I preaise God for it, because it worked out perfectly, and we got back to the studio just in time!.

All in all, it was a great performance. The youngest to the oldest had a great time, and we know that so much of what we do sticks with the kids. We had many of the leaders and teachers coming up to tell us how blessed they were to have us come. To me, this is the whole reason that I am here, and the best part of it too! It is a thrill to be able to perform, but more than that, to share the about the amazing story of the Gospel. From encouraging the believers to witnessing to the unbelievers. I feel honored that God would use me. Which just causes me to want to do it more!

We have another performance tomorrow and an adult home, so I'll be posting again soon... until then, be blessed!

Dramas, Toys, and Treasures.

Wow, blog number 2! I'm doing better than I thougth I would be doing at this point! ha.

Still no performances to report, but we have been doing quite a lot this past week. We finished learning all the dramas. We even started to video tape them. It was so neat to see what everyone came up with and how they put it together. it actually kind of inspired me... me being that random creative mind that I am. I've been thinking about what kind of drama I would put together. what would it look like? what characters would there be? how would I get the message across? Honestly I've got lots of ideas, but those will be for some other time... the one thing I realized is how much I love doing stuff like that. Isn't funny how when you find somthing you really like to do, you feel fulfilled when you do it? It's the same thing with what I am doing here. I feel like I am fulfilling a greater calling in my life. Of course, for those of us who believe, we know what the great Calling is! How cool is that!

Anyway, enough self relfection, back to Light of the World Ballet.
We started learning the coreography for "You are Special," a ballet based off of Max Lucado's best selling children's book. We only got through one dance today, but the ballet seems really cute. It is definitely a good ballet for kids to see. For those of you who have never heard the story, it is about a Toy Maker, Eli, and and all the wooden toys, called Wemmicks that he has created. The Wemmicks live in a little town called wemmicksville. They either earn stars to wear if they excelle at something or are do something good, or they get dots to wear if they are clumsy and awkward. Punchinello is one of those toys and all he earns is dots. He thinks badly of himself until he learns from Eli that he was made special! Its actually a really good book. They sell it at the store that I work at.
I love it, because there are so many kids that look down on themselves. But aren't we all made in the image of God for a special purpose?! The obvious answer to that question is yes, but how often do we, oldest to the youngest, still let the world tell us what we are worth?

Light of the World is also learning Treasure Hunting! We are meeting with a few interns at a local church to learn about it and try it. I am actually pretty excited about it. We met with the interns today and they were telling about the stories they have had out treasure hunting. I think I would describe treasure hunting as prophetic evangelism. Which is pretty darn cool. I think it is good for all of us to step out of our cofort zones to minister to people. It is one thing to minister to people that how come to see you dance, it is something else intirely to minister to some random person that you have never met before. And for that, I a greatful that we get to do this. It's been so long since I've had the opportunity to do something like this, and from experience, I know that when are hearts are after God He will do some pretty darn amazing things. Plus, I always get a rush when I see God reaching people through me. Not that I am seeking after things for myself, but it is a perk! :) (had to add the smiley after that one. ha)

Although, I could add so much more, I really don't want to make this so long that no one will read it... so this is me signing off... though, I'm delaying it with pointless words because I really don't want it to end. Sigh... I could write for hours. I guess you could say that is one thing I definitely got from my mom!

Blog number 1... the first if many, I'm sure

Hello!
Well, I did it! I started a blog. Yes, I gave into the pressure... everyone is doing it, you know... I guess that makes it the "thing-to-do." Yeah, I'm ususally a bit late to pick up the latest fad, but I'm excited about this cause it's a great way to keep people update on my happenings in NY!

It's January, and frankly it seems like a slow month. Bookings seem to be in short supply for the company in January, but I'm told that this happens every year. Our next show is the first week of February. So we're in the studio everyday. Working hard and getting stuff done.Our director, Ashley has been on a Pilates kick as of late so wehave been doing that a lot. But I have found that it's helping a lot with my class work. yay!

This week we have learning dramas that the Trainee level 2s have put together. They started them early last semester and now they are beginnning to set them on us. It's actually pretty fun! All of them have the salvation message. Who know? maybe we will use them at a show one day. Amy's is about a birthday party. We all get to be little kids (which surprisingly is that hard for us to do... haha) and eventually she finds that the gift of God is eternal life. It's pretty awesome skipping around and goofing off like a kid at a party. I think we are almost having too much fun. Alyssa I's Drama is about a girl, that get attacked by sins and oppression and finds freedom in Jesus. This one os fun too, but I actually got cast os the roll of Satan.... hmmmm. That is the second head evil person role I got cast in this year. haha. Not sure whether to laugh or to cry! Well, I guess it would ake sensze since I am, after all, the tallest and apparently I have eyes that can look intense (according to my roomie). Thursday we will learn Rachel's coreography. I got to hear her go throught the process of creating it, so it will be exciting to see it finally come to life! I was told that I'll be playing the role of drunkeness... fun! (she says sarcastically). I don't know how I a going to do it, but I'll take it as a challenge!

I am actually starting to enjoy this time off from performing as much. We have more time to get into other things. In our discipleship training, we are learning about prayer. And this week we are learning about worshiping in our prayer time. I don't know about the other girls, but i'm being challenged in new ways. And really, in that, God has shown me so much more of Himself. It's actually really cool! We have been taking time before every class to worship. We'll put on a song and worship in own own expression. I realized that is why I love dance. It's a way to express my worship to God. It's me, and I feel His pleasure when I'm dancing before Him. I feel at home when I'm in His presence, bowing my knee and giving Him all my praise. I heard someone say the other day that there is something about worshiping the Lord with all your might that not many people get to esperience. There is something about "laying yourself out there," as they say in the secular dance world and giving your all in worship. And it is so true! Like when David danced before the Ark of the Covenant. He danced with all his might. There is something I can't explain that occures in that moment. We were created to worship... our lives are worship... are service is worship... our love is worship. Let us give our all, in all we do, to live our lives to the glory of His name! if you think about all that He has done for us, how could we not? It would be selfish to hold anything back. I was listening to the song today,I love the Words. Let it sink into your hearts.


In Christ alone my hope is found,
He is my light, my strength, my song;
this Cornerstone, this solid Ground,
firm through the fiercest drought and storm.
What heights of love, what depths of peace,
when fears are stilled, when strivings cease!
My Comforter, my All in All,
here in the love of Christ I stand.

In Christ alone! who took on flesh
Fulness of God in helpless babe!
This gift of love and righteousness
Scorned by the ones he came to save:
Till on that cross as Jesus died,
The wrath of God was satisfied -
For every sin on Him was laid;
Here in the death of Christ I live.

There in the ground His body lay
Light of the world by darkness slain:
Then bursting forth in glorious Day
Up from the grave he rose again!
And as He stands in victory
Sin's curse has lost its grip on me,
For I am His and He is mine -
Bought with the precious blood of Christ.

No guilt in life, no fear in death,
This is the power of Christ in me;
From life's first cry to final breath.
Jesus commands my destiny.
No power of hell, no scheme of man,
Can ever pluck me from His hand;
Till He returns or calls me home,
Here in the power of Christ I'll stand.